Hey there.

If you’re reading this, one or more of your parents have recently died. You may feel weighted with grief, or cold with shock. If you had a strained relationship with your parents, you may feel ambivalent or relieved or celebratory. All of these are valid emotional responses.

Unfortunately, our legal and financial systems don’t care about your feelings. Starting now, your parents get to rest—but you don’t. It’s unfair, maybe even cruel. It’s certainly ridiculous. While it’s always important to take care of yourself, you are about to enter a labyrinth of paperwork and bureaucracy that will take you months to navigate at best, and years at worst.

I know, because I’m right there with you. My mom died in 2020, and my dad died in 2023. I was 35 when I became executor of their estate, and I had no idea what I was doing. Since then, I’ve learned the hard way. I created this website so you wouldn’t have to learn the hard way.

Now helping people with post-death logistics—and helping companies serve those people—is my full-time gig. Trauma response turned career: the American dream at work.

Who am I?

Great question. I’m Becky Robison (she/her). I’m a writer living in Louisville, Kentucky, and my parents are dead. In 2024, I quit my corporate communications job to focus on helping people with dead parents professionally. My book My Parents Are Dead: What Now? A Practical Guide to Your Life After Their Death is forthcoming from Quirk Books next year.

Why should you listen to me?

If you have dead or dying parents—or if you just want to be prepared—I have the writing experience to explain complex processes without hideous legal jargon, and I have the education experience to teach you what you need to know. (If I can teach undergraduates how to properly cite their sources, I can teach anything.) Plus, we’re in the same boat. I know how hard parental loss can be.

If you’re an industry professional—shout out to the hospice workers, funeral directors, death doulas, estate attorneys, grief therapists, and others who come through for people in their worst moments—you can trust my corporate communications experience to reach Millennials and Zoomers. (Those are your customers now! It’s weird, right?) I also spent several years working in business intelligence. From marketing materials, to employee benefits, to speaking gigs and more, I can help.

Disclaimers.

  • I am neither a lawyer nor an accountant. Think of this site as advice from one friend to another rather than formal legal or financial counsel.

  • This site is a living document—I’m always adding new information and features. If I’ve missed something important, drop me a line!

  • While this site focuses on parent deaths, some (but not all!) of the information may be helpful after the loss of a spouse or any other loved one.

  • I often use gallows humor to cope with my grief. Please honor your own needs and stop reading or skip parts if necessary.

  • This site is intended for folks in the United States.

  • This site is intended for adults who are acting as an executor and/or successor trustee. If you’re younger than 18, you should have a legal guardian who can take care of everything. I hope that guardian is protecting you with the love and compassion you deserve.